Most churches offer a women’s discipleship program at some point, but few have a clear, intentional model for what that means or how to do it well. “Discipleship” can become a catch-all term for everything from casual coffee dates to Bible study homework help.
But if we want to raise up spiritual mothers (women who know how to walk with Christ and help others do the same), we need more than just good intentions. We need a framework.
There’s no one-size-fits-all blueprint, and that’s okay. But if you’re looking to build a mentorship program that actually changes lives, here are some practical, field-tested ideas to help you start strong.
Lay the Foundation: 4 Key Questions
Before launching a discipleship program, it’s wise to take a step back and clarify your goals. A solid foundation starts with asking the right questions:
- What is the purpose of your program? Are you aiming for spiritual friendship, intentional mentoring, biblical literacy, or something else? Your purpose will shape your structure, your content, and your expectations.
- What is the content of your program? What will the discipleship pairs actually study or do together? Will they work through Scripture? Use a curriculum? Discuss life and pray together? Discipleship should lead people toward spiritual maturity, not just provide Christian companionship.
- How are mentors selected and trained? Not everyone who wants to mentor is ready to do so. What qualifications are you looking for? Will mentors receive guidance on how to lead well, what to say (and what not to say), and how to handle difficult conversations?
- To whom are mentors accountable? Mentoring is relational, but it shouldn’t be isolated. Who checks in with mentors? Who provides oversight, support, or help when needed?
Neglecting these questions opens the door to discipleship programs that are either vague and ineffective or unintentionally harmful. Without structure and purpose, discipleship can become little more than moralistic cheerleading or a glorified buddy system. Worse, it may leave women spiritually malnourished while giving the illusion of growth.
If these questions are neglected, we risk reducing discipleship to moralistic fluff and/or a glorified buddy system.
Keep Rooted in the Bigger Picture
A discipleship program is most effective when it functions as part of a larger whole, not as a stand-alone ministry. In my experience, discipleship thrives best when it complements existing women’s ministries and church-wide efforts rather than replacing or duplicating them. It’s one piece of the larger puzzle, not the entire picture.
Discipleship isn’t meant to compete with Bible studies or small groups; it’s meant to deepen the fruit of those ministries by offering more personal, life-on-life investment. When aligned with the broader mission of the church, discipleship becomes a natural next step in spiritual growth, not a separate track that pulls women away from corporate learning or community life.
Small Groups Often Work Better than 1-1
While one-on-one mentorship has value, I’ve found that small groups—one leader with two to five women—often work better in practice. They allow more women to participate and foster greater consistency and accountability.
But don’t let the word group mislead you. This isn’t a formal class or lecture. The leader doesn’t need to be a seasoned teacher or have all the answers. Her role is more like a spiritual mother: someone a few steps ahead in the faith, guiding others with grace, wisdom, and humility.
These small gatherings work best when they feel relational, not rigid: a space to open Scripture together, share real life, pray, and walk alongside one another in love.
Clarity Invites Commitment
In most churches, there are more women hoping to be mentored than there are women willing to lead. One way to encourage more participation is to offer clarity. Vague expectations can feel overwhelming, but a clear, reasonable commitment helps potential mentors say yes with confidence.
When recruiting, be specific about what the role involves. Here’s an example of how you might frame it:
Responsibilities of a discipleship group leader:
- Lead a group of 2 to 5 women. These small groups provide space for deeper relationships and mutual encouragement.
- Meet once a month. Ideally, gatherings happen in your home or in a participant’s home. If needed, you can meet at church. Flexibility is welcome, but consistency is key.
- Commit to a two-year term. We understand life happens, but the goal is to build long-term relationships. Meeting monthly over two years allows for meaningful growth and connection.
- Facilitate, don’t lecture. This is not a formal teaching environment. You don’t need to prepare a lesson. Your job is to guide discussion, listen well, and help point women toward Christ.
- Provide spiritual nurturing, not counseling. This is a relational ministry, not therapy. That said, nurturing doesn’t fall solely on the leader. In healthy groups, the care and encouragement will flow both ways.
Let potential leaders know they’re not alone. Offer training, resources, and ongoing support. Remind them that they don’t need to be experts, just faithful women willing to walk alongside others in grace and truth.
A successful discipleship program begins with a clear purpose, intentional mentor training, and small groups that encourage accountability and trust. The goal is not to produce teachers, but to cultivate spiritual mothers, women who model faith, offer wisdom, and help others grow strong in Christ.
A successful discipleship program starts with clear purpose, trained mentors, and small groups that foster accountability. Focus on building spiritual mothers, not just teachers, and integrate your program into your larger women’s ministry vision.
Download Free Sample Discipleship Survey
Please email me and let me know how this worked for you or ways you changed and improved it.
Final Encouragement
Discipleship doesn’t require perfection. It requires presence. You don’t need to be a Bible expert or have all the answers. You just need a willing heart, a teachable spirit, and a desire to walk with other women in truth and grace.
Whether you’re organizing a church-wide program or gathering a few women around your kitchen table, don’t underestimate what God can do through ordinary faithfulness. When women walk together in the Word, lives are changed. Sometimes in quiet, unseen ways that bear fruit for years to come.
Start small. Be clear. Stay anchored in Scripture. And trust that God will use your investment in others to grow not only them—but you, too.
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